Cynical Views of The Rules of Boating

Read once & laugh, read twice & understand.

1) Leaving the dock is optional, Every return is mandatory

2) If you turn the wheel towards the shore, the houses get bigger. If you turn the wheel away from shore, they get smaller. That is, unless you keep turning the wheel and then they get bigger and smaller and bigger.

3) Boating isn't dangerous. Sinking is what's dangerous.

4) It is always better to be on shore wishing you were out there than being out there and wishing you were on shore.

5) The ONLY time you have too much fuel is when the boat is on fire.

6) The sail is just a big awning used by sailors to keep the Captain cool. When it rips to shreds, you can actually see the Captain sweat.

7) When in doubt, stay out to sea. No one has ever run aground on a wave.

8) A 'good' return to your slip is one you can walk away from. A 'great' return is one after which you can use the boat again.

9) Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make them all by yourself.

By Jeri Dake
UK Shark Tagging Programme

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